Why am I Even-

So the new topic for our blog was something I didn't expect at all, but I wasn't surprised BUT I wasn't ready.

It was about the reason why I continue to study here.

Well, actually that was a pretty good question. Why do I even bother to continue studying in a school with too much requirements and projects and all these fancy rules about haircuts and makeup? Not that I really cared about my hair nor make-up (I'm actually pretty scared of make-up) but STILL. I could just, I don't know find another school here and there who don't even have classes on Friday. And here we are dumped in a sack full of assignments that you have to pass at the end of the day. I could just escape this school which brings more problems everyday, as if research study is not enough. Like seriously, why?

I can imagine it, the glory and beauty of freedom and happiness. I could just sign some papers and off I go to Wonderland, where I can be Valedictorian and have scholarship without doing research and a bunch of stuff I doubt we'll be using in our future jobs.

Why?

Maybe my subconscious screams that: You started it, you END it. Makes sense right? I chose this way of life, I must stand my ground, right? NO. I actually didn't know this school had research and Spanish and well a bunch of stuff I'm not gonna mention EXISTS in this school and maybe I like, decided fifty times before going here. Well, I'm half-way there (sort of) and let's face it: transferring is too complicated a process and those precious time could be spent by playing Skyrim instead. And maybe I'm just lazy to do it.

Second reason might be.... IT WOULD BRING SHAME AND DISHONOR. I'm pretty much the black sheep of the family and doing this, well might add fuel to the fire. Like heck my haters (which also happens to be most of my family) would gossip and blame me for everything and whatever they can make a connection to the topic: the pussy transfers school. And they would say: "You used to be like this.. blah blah" idk I don't even listen to what they're saying is anymore. I'm just continue studying here because of my family.

Third reason? Friends? If they even are one. Maybe the only thing good about school is your friends. Wait, it actually is! Maybe we spent so many time together that they actually make up my day and for a second, they make me forget all the problems and requirements in the world. So I'm not going to leave a territory where you know people and people know you and you don't fight each other whatsoever.

Fourth and final reason: this is the nearest school that could actually make my future good for once. No offense to other schools but the rest are pretty much full of... well, freedom. Too much freedom is bad trust me I've seen enough pregnant teenagers, kids wearing make-up and skimpy dresses, fraternity kids, teens who do drugs and smoke and say "sh**" every second. Don't judge the book by its cover: sometimes other books DON'T EVEN HAVE COVERS TO JUDGE FROM.

So let's move on tot he other question: Does this institution really help shape my personality?

I can't really express myself, but it does make my patience long. For example, I'm seething with annoyance and I'm forced to hide it and smile and project and talk nicely because if I don't, well goodbye high school for me. And it does make me more of a diligent person and does add to my persevering skills. That's it I guess. I'm as stubborn as a rock, no a diamond, and I often find myself not following orders or rules or agreements when I really really really don't like to do it. Nobody ever won a stubborn contest with me, no risks included. And maybe it makes me wiser. The school gives me problems every hour every weekday and all these problems along with other ones that is, makes me tougher and wiser. I learn from my mistakes and I learn what to do in this kind of situation that would do me best. Well, that's just a maybe.

But maybe it does.

Maybe it does change me. We never fully know do we?